I may be fucked today, but I’m not completely fucked…maybe

So, Raquel got 3.5 hours of sleep last night, which is absolutely horrendous since I normally get 8-9+ hours of sleep. So, you can imagine, today’s going to be FUCKED.

But, I’m holding onto hope that it won’t be completely fucked. Just like any other person, me being hungry and sleep deprived is a dangerous combination. Soon, I’ll take care of the hunger part (by the way, don’t ever try to go to sleep hungry) but the sleep part will be tougher. I’m planning to sleep on the train to school, and definitely 1.5 to either one hour or two during my 3 hour break and I may even cancel therapy alltogether and come home early so I can sleep more too.

Basically my goal today is just to stay awake during class, honor my T-shirt (the suicide prevention one) and try not to act on any of these:

• a suicidal thought
• a shits and giggles I’m bored and don’t know what my intentions are actually thought
• self-harm
• scratching

This t-shirt may wind up saving my ass (hence the not completely fucked part). Or I may just ignore it. Sorry, sleep deprivation can be damaging and dangerous for me.

I guess we’ll see what happens.

God, I’m tired. 6A.