If you’ve recently come across my blog, you may notice the little slogan that I parade around shamelessly: That of badassery.
My new about the blog says “Journey to Survivor Badassery”. I talk often about how I am a survivor radiating badassery. Of how badass I am, that I’m a badass motherfucker (it’s part of my identity *hair flip*) and everything anything related to badassery. I’m EVEN a badass unicorn. Can’t get any more badass than that (though I’ll try!)
But you may wonder, where did this origin of badassery take place?
Well, now I will finally tell you all.
So this ship of badassery really set sail when my lovely blogger friend Imani Summer saw my badassery sign (it’s practically a plaque, but really it’s a card) tacked up on my framed billboard overlooking my bookcase (of badassery) in a vlog I shared with her.
Here it is for ALL to see:
And really, where did THAT originate from?
Well, let me tell you, child. (and I mean that in a wise old lady fashion ;))
Back in October 2015 I stayed for five weeks at the OCD Institute in McLean Belmont. I live in the state, so it’s not so bad, but it’s one of three national OCD places in the USA, and it’s kinda a big deal. People from around the WORLD go to get treated at McLean. It’s top shit. I still go there each month for the OCD support group they have. Which is something I highly recommend to people, going to support groups can be very, very helpful. I started going there when I was at my stay.
Any who, each day much like in psych units anyway (it was an UNlocked unit as well) we had to come up with our goals for the day. They couldn’t be anything particularly simplistic like ‘staying positive’ (I fucking did it anyway) but something doable and constructive.
The first full day I was at the OCD-I my goal was literally:
“To tell the OCD to F* off”
That is the BADASSERY I brought to the table. It was awesome.
During my stay there I really felt I could be my genuine, authentic self. It’s where I first made little positive messages, something I would go on to do the entire year of 2016. (Well, except January).
Now comes the real bread winner. One day I said as my goal:
“Today I’m going to radiate badassery”
Or something along those lines. I remember one of the workers looked with confusion, not understanding what a badass meant, but it got some laughs and some metaphorical pats on the back for me. It was a great moment.
I also began painting while I was there, and before I left I featured the work I had created in a little art show on the unit (totally got the idea from someone else). It was really cool. And before I left, everyone would get a card that people could sign, and I got mine, and one of my friends put that quote on there.
In reference a tad to a painting I had made that said “Go forth and frolic”.
And that peeps, is the story of how I radiate badassery. I’m working still on being the survivor part, but I think I’ll nail it one day. 🙂
Thanks so much for reading!!
Oh wait, one other thing! I also made this drawing about my badassery: