A new unspoken (until now) goal of mine is to make a blog post every day for a week. So far, it’s been working. I started this on the day I got out of the hospital, and my last couple of posts have been about other series/topics than a life update. For this, I am quite relieved. I don’t have much positivity to upload right now. I’m not AS depressed today, right this moment, yet I’m still unhappy. Mocha is a lot of work, and being back from the hospital reminds me of those depression commercials where the owner can’t be there for their doggo. Basically me right now.
Ideally, I’d like to go on with and continue my series that I’ve been having since the start of this blog. Being in a partial kind of helps with that as it reminds me of what I want to share on here. I would like more time for myself and I miss that. Unfortunately, it’s just not in the cards for me right now. I guess I’m just unhappy with my life and where I’m going, which feels like ground zero where the explosion went off and no one’s there (a lie) to save me or see me. It feels like I’m back at the beginning, even though it’s a different starting point, a different middle point.
I don’t know how to be peppy and bright again. For now, I’m just a dull shineless bulb. Until I can figure out how I want to plan my days, weeks and months, I’m going to be sinking further into this rat’s nest. Regardless, I will do my best to keep up the appearances, both on this blog and off. I want to finish a lot of the drafts that I have and unfinished projects and sharing the newer projects I’ve been up to.
I can’t recall if I mentioned it before, but I fell in love with crayons now. I’d like to buy a big pack of them someday in the future. They have so many colors, too.
For this post, I’d like to share what my unpublished drafts are. Some of them have been there for a year, some for a few days, some for months. I’d also like to share what I aspire to complete in the future and what I have to do this weekend. Let’s jump in!
Unpublished/Unfinished Drafts:
- This post
- Recovery A to Z challenge, F is for friendship (and a snippet on forgiveness)
- My Life’s Pursuit (a daily prompt)
- Strength Only Comes After the Storm SADIJ3 Day #14
- “The Edge of Seventeen” Film Review #2
- “Demolition” Film Review #3
- “The Shade of the Moon” OLD Book Review
- “Cut” OLD Book Review
- Recovery Restoration Vol. #1 Day #2
- #RecoveryHome Project Day #4–#7
- “The Cards We’re Dealt” Spoilers & Work Thru (my novel)
To be Completed/Posted in the Future:
- Recovery A to Z challenge
- Song a Day Mental health edition challenge
- Daily prompts
- Photo challenges
- “Coastline” (original short story)
- Book reviews
- Film reviews
- Stationery/shopping
- #RecoveryHome
- Recovery Restoration
- Art therapy
- Therapy notes
- Therapy lectures
- Workbook challenges
- My coping strategies
- Fanfiction/fan art
- Drawings/Artwork
- Youtube videos
- Life updates
- Epic posts
My To Do for the Weekend & Week Ahead:
- Continue blogging each day
- Read 2 books
- Complete 2 book reviews
- Do laundry
- Shower
- Walk Mocha
- Buy ice cream
- Get gas
- Send an important email
- Get enough sleep
- Go to partial (which started on Fri)
- Download new music
- Write letters
- Create 5 new art pieces
I have to cut this post short, I’m unstable now.
I hope it was a good post. Sorry.
You don’t need to apologize to us. You don’t need to be peppy all the time. You don’t need to put up a front, at least not here with us. You can just be you, whatever that entails. We love you here. xoxo
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How are you today my loveliest pop tart? Sending lots of love from the UK. I have done lots of organising of stationary today. You would have been proud of me π xxx
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No need to say sorry at the end of this post. You are amazing for continuing to try despite your recent hospitalisation. I’m thinking of you lovely xxxxxxxxx ππππππππ
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I would have ended it better if Mocha didn’t have to go outside and me to get all bothered by that. Sigh. Now I’m just sulking but with barely any words to come out of my lips. π¦
Thanks though. β€ β€
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Oh hun…I’m sorry you feel so triggered and shitty. The thing with your personality (and mine) is that when you feel well your personality is very vibrant and expressive, which almost makes the lows and agitation worse to deal with. You are a person who shines, and going through an unshiny period feels SHIT. Ride this shit out though darlin xx Have you done any reading about dialectical behaviour therapy? That helps me weather crises and lows. Sometimes though there is nothing anyone can say that eases your discomfort and that is so hard. I’ll check in on you tomorrow ππππ Xxxx hugs
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